TRANSCIPT

Leadership Coach Reacts: WTH Did My Boss Send Me?!

JASON -

What’s up guys!

This is your leadership coach, Jason.

Today we're going to be looking at a Whatsapp that was sent by one of you guys.

Let's see what that boss has to say.

"From now on, nobody is allowed to use the meeting room for your meals!

Unless you are responsible for thencleaning up after your meals."

Okay so the boss seems pissed.

And he's taking it out on the guys through Whatsapp.

One thing I when I coach leaders one is that you need to understand that when you're emotional, do not engage.

And especially if you're trying to give feedback in an emotional way, never ever use the medium of Whatsapp or of email.

Why?

Because they cannot see you, they cannot feel your tonality, they don't know your body language.

Everything is a blur.

They only see text and when you share all these things out, you know Whatsapp, it's very difficult for people to answer in a way that's satisfactory to you.

So never do that.

If you want to give feedback and you're emotional, calm down first and when you give feedback always use either face to face or Zoom.

So let's carry on.

"I have no idea why some people think that cleaning up after yourself is the responsibility of someone else!"

So probably people messed up the place and never cleaned up.

Maybe coffee stains, food stains.

"I guess it's probably because many of you grew up with helpers doing all this menial work for you??"

Right...

So when you are giving feedback, never try to push that person to a corner to say that this is the reason why, this is your character.

You want to always be objective.

What you want to be talking about is the behavior that happened.

Not judging that character - "Oh you are like that because you grew up this way."

Or "You are like that because you're from this place."

Never do that.

Always be objective and talk about the the topic, or the behavior, or the action that you saw.

"This new rule applies to the tables outside too!

Such a shame that I have to send such a message!"

[LEARNING POINT]
Vocab is important guys.

As leaders, take away this word "shame".

Who uses shame?

Game of Thrones uses shame.

So this guy is pissed off and when he's pissed off, he's taking it out.

And the funny thing about Whatsapp is that it will never be a satisfactory return that you want.

They will probably say what?

"Okay."

"Noted."

"Noted with thanks."

And it's nothing that you feel satisfactory because why?

They cannot write something very long and if they start writing something very long, and this was a group chat, then other people need to feel pressured to write something very long as well.

Who has more word count, then that kind of means that you're more sincere.

But that's not true as well.

So when you're giving feedback, when you think about this, learn this leadership lesson.

Anytime you give feedback and you're emotional, disengage.

Only engage when you are able to be objective.

Never fault the character of that person - "Oh you grew up like that."

Always talk about the problem, the objective.

Lastly, Whatsapp is a really bad medium guys.

If you are doing it right now, please change the way you do it.

Zoom is so much better, at least you see that person and you can talk it out.

And when there's this kind of feedback, understand that emotions are high.

So be respectful of why they do certain things and understand that actually if this is the first time, maybe they really forgot, they really didn't know.

So give them that benefit of doubt.

If it's the third, fourth time then yeah, you can share certain things like: "Hey you know what, this is the reason why we're gonna be trying to implement these things, I hope you guys can help out."

So always draw from them that commitment.

What you're doing right now is that you're moving so far away from commitment, you're moving all the way to compliance.

That means I have the authority, I'm your boss, this is what you should do.

No, that won't work after a while.

If you're not there, they're going to be doing that, right?

When the cat's away, the mice will play.

That's what they say.

So you want commitment, not compliance.

Commitment means "Hey guys, this is this is our place. It's not only your office, it's also my office, it's our office. Let's work together to have a place where all of us can feel great about working."

So that's all I have for you today.

If you like this video and you learned something, give it a like, show me some love and if you feel that you learned something, do share it with others.

I would love to hear what you think about it in the comments below.

Until next time, be the leader that everybody wants to follow.

See ya!

(key words: leadership, leadershiplessons, leadershipcoachreacts, leadersofinfluence, compliance, commitment, tonality, feedback, whatsapp)